Tuesday 30 September 2008

Like a Virgin

My Dearest Darlings, in reference to the above post and as previously promised I'm offering here a few tips to the few men ‘brave’ enough to improve on their lot, though unlike the cosmetic corporations my recommendations are not gender specific, they are universally relevant. If you have never embarked on cosmetic enhancement then I suggest you take a deep breathe. Look in the mirror and try not to be too critical of your own face, however much it repulses you try to look kindly on your vileness. The following tips are helpful if you require a healthy day time look for both men and women.

Step1: Exfoliation is an essential part of any beauty regime as it loosens dead skin cells and creates a solid foundation for what is to come. I prefer a relatively harsh exfoliate as I feel it has the best results though it is best to find a product that suits your own skin type. I find the St Ives range extremely reliable!

Step2: Next moisturising, I believe that a good moisturiser is vitally important, it takes years to find a good product, as they evolve and change I would suggest careful experimentation until you find one that suits. I find an oil free option is best as it prevents the pores from becoming too clogged.

Step3: Once moisturised it is best to let the skin rest before embarking on any cosmetic procedures, allow the moisture to fully penetrate the skin. At this point I would assess the need for cosmetic correction carefully. Blemishes are seldom as dramatic as they feel and coverage is only essential if they absolutely demand it. If you feel totally unable to leave the house with the atrocity that dominates your appearance then carefully select a concealer that matches your skin tone. Once selected apply the product only where redness is visible. Use your smallest finger or if your swollen digits are too clumsy use a cotton bud, be gentle and use the product sparingly. Once applied view your work in various lighting scenarios, daylight is the harshest so if it works there it will work anywhere. If concealer has failed, veils or hats can be an acceptable emergency option or even an alteration of your normal hairstyle can mask the most heinous of eruptions.

Step4: Next a gentle bronzer will give the illusion of a healthy glow and also has the added benefit of reducing the appearance of redness. Try to avoid over use as this can occasionally encourage satsuma comparison. Using a large soft brush evenly disperse bronzing balls (I find these the simplest to apply) to the face not forgetting the neck. Avoiding the under eye has the effect of lighting this area which is prone to dark circles often associated with unhealthy lifestyles. If dark circles are prevalent YSL's ‘Touché Eclat’ is the best product, it is light diffusing and has the added bonus of reflecting the unwanted flash bulbs of unforgiving paparazzi photographers, though I doubt this is something you will have to concern yourselves with.

Step5: An essential part of any vanity case is a pair of eyelash curlers; they miraculously turn short stumpy lashes into perky up turned eye enhancers, opening up the eye enabling light to capture the richness and vivacity of your eye colour. Embark on this procedure with caution and never apply mascara before curling, or your eyelashes will weaken and begin to leap onto your cheeks like lemmings of a cliff. The application of mascara is perhaps the only area prone to gender specificities, though whilst you're keeping this natural I suggest that women and men can benefit from the following advice. After curling the eyelashes apply a small amount of mascara on the upper lashes, from root to end in one fowl swoop. Once dried use a small eye make-up brush to separate the now clumped lashes, this creates the definition without the ‘mascara effect’, spidery black limbs sprouting from ones eyes is much more of an evening look than day wear especially for a young gentleman.

Step6: The most essential and profoundly important part of beauty maintenance is your eyebrows. They offer architectural form to the most flabby of bone structures and are able to efficiently frame your eyes, their linear qualities enliven the most humble and crumbling of façades. To tackle this area requires great bravery and I feel space is too limited to offer the proper advice. I am offering a link here to some external experts who have spent their careers on a quest for the perfect brow, though alas men are too often neglected in this department. Frequently men pluck their own eyebrows forgetting they have larger faces than women. As a result swathes of men appear to have gender confused brows placed on their foreheads. My advice for the men folk is to limit your plucking to tidying and maintenance, do not attempt to shape your eyebrows without the supervision of an expert.

Step7: Your final step to make-up heaven is a gentle lip balm; I find this an essential requirement to maintain a luscious lip, though importantly I use a petroleum free product. The benefit of this is that your lips remain regularly plumped without becoming reliant on a balm. Petroleum based products such as Vaseline actually dry the lips if the product is not used regularly.

Now with some luck and the strict following of my advice you should be ready to present your average faces to a largely indifferent world.

Much Love The Dazzling Ms Coco LaVerne x